


I'm Not Sorry

by Beautiful Chaos (Venkaskribbles)



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Other, Team Arrow, olicity - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-20
Updated: 2014-05-20
Packaged: 2018-01-25 21:34:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1663238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Venkaskribbles/pseuds/Beautiful%20Chaos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Following the Season Two finale, Team Arrow takes a short respite on their way back from the Island to gather their thoughts, and take a rest. Oliver discovers that Felicity's brush with Slade is not without its consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Not Sorry

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own anything! I do this for the love of Olicity!

After a four hour flight from the Lian Yu to mainland, the trio made their way up the three flights of stairs to an ARGUS safehouse. Waller had offered it to them when the support flight the trio was taking back to Starling City had been delayed until morning. When Oliver opened the door, he was pleased to see that the place was was much nicer on the inside than it appeared to be from the neighborhood surrounding it. 

The entryway table held a several steaming bamboo containers of what he was certain would be dumplings and steamed vegetables. There was a six pack of Dig’s favorite beer, a bottle of excellent Merlot for Felicity, and a 30 year old bottle of scotch.

Felicity made a sound that was almost a purr when she saw the wine, taking two quick steps to stanch it up, clutching it to her chest with a grin. 

“So…closest we can expect to an apology from Waller?” She asked, leaning over to take a deep breath of the steaming hot food. Oliver couldn’t help but smile as he set her small duffel down next to his on the entry way floor. He moved into the center of the room, scanning the apartment for additional exits and judging the distance between he main bay window and the building across the alley.

“I’d imagine so, although I did make one more request that hopefully will be complete by the time we get back.” He turned towards the kitchen to grab some plates and utensil, glad to see it was fully stocked. “It was Dig’s idea actually, something about you nerding out over ARGUS computers or something….”

“No idea what he is talking about….” Dig replied, failing to suppress a smile.

A squeak of joy escaped her and she darted over and gave him a hug. He laughed and returned the gesture easily, pulling a beer out for himself and grabbing the twined bamboo steamers to move them over to the kitchen. Felicity deposited the scotch and wine on the counter where Oliver had already started to unstack the steamers before kicking off her shoes. Her face sombered a little as she moved to look out of the window. Letting the late afternoon sun warm her face for a moment, she pulled her jacket off and laid it on the window sill.

“I’ll be glad to get back as soon as we can. I have a lot of work to do before people have time to stop dealing with the clean-up and start looking for answers. With Slade on the Island being sold by ARGUS to the public as dead, and Sebastian and Isabel actually dead and unmasked as part of Slade’s trifecta of insanity, it will make trying to get Queen Consolidated, and the rest of your assets back a lot easier. Stolen by terrorists is a good first step. Now that I have access to Slade’s network keys, I need to make sure that everything points in the right direction, and not towards the Arrow….or the rest of us honestly. Who knows how much research he had stored up.”

Digg frowned as he also took off his jacket, moving to examine the small potbelly stove in the corner of the livingroom.

“I’m surprised that Waller isn’t just making all of that disappear.” He opened the stove door and tossed in a small firestarter and a few logs.

“She wanted to.” Oliver offered as he stepped into join them, handing Felicity a glass of wine. “Felicity convinced her on the flight over not too. Starling City has lost too much, first the Undertaking, and then this…trying to bury the whole thing…trying to bury the _why_ …”

She took the glass with a small smile, moving to hold it with both hands to warm it up just a bit. “It won’t be the whole truth obviously, but they need to have something to latch onto as to why this happened. Why people died. If they didn’t…we couldn’t even guess at the roads they would go down to find the truth. We would never be able to do the work that needs to get done if Oliver was dodging a witch hunt.” She took a deep breath. “I’m just glad Waller agreed to give me the hardware I needed to do it myself. I don’t trust her, certainly not with something like this. And especially not after her flying the apocolaype flag over Starling.” She shivered, and shook her head, as if trying to clear those thoughts from her mind. Instead, she raised her glass, a small determined smile on her face. “No more of that for tonight though.”

Digg tossed a match into the corner stove and stood. He clinked his glass against hers, and Oliver’s in turn. “Tomorrow.” He said simply, echoed quietly by his two friends. 

Several hours, an absurd volume of dumplings and vegetables, and a healthy dose of alcohol later, the trio were about as relaxed as they had been in months. Night had settled fully on the bustling city. Felicity, buzzed on wine with a full belly had sunken as far back into the large couch as she could, hugging a decorative pillow to her chest. Having tugged the elastic out of her hair and pushed her glasses onto of her head, she swore she was just going to rest her eyes. All of a minute later she was out, dozing lightly.

Oliver and Digg had settled into a companiable silence after going through a few magazines and newspapers that were left on the coffee table. They collectively had missed a lot…the world continuing to spin on without them while they had been wrapped up in their all consuming war with Slade.

Digg’s gaze had settled on Felicity for the past few minutes, glad to see her comfortable enough to just doze off in a new place. Eyes narrowing, he took stock of the bruises beginning to develop on her arms and shoulders, the peach sleeveless shell concealing little of the damage the last 72 hours had inflicted. He remembered the cold feeling of nausea that had settled into his stomach when Felicity had told him how she and Oliver had managed to get the cure into Slade. It had taken most of his self-control not to punch Oliver in the face. He had only gone one on one with Slade once, and for all of five seconds. Despite all of his training and experience, the only thing he had gotten for his trouble was having his ass tossed across the foundry. Giving that monster Felicity…on purpose…John took a deep calming breath. The outline of four large fingers marred her upper arm, deep bruising left by Slade’s grip. 

“Oliver…I’m not usually the guy to get into someone’s business…” Oliver’s brow shot up, the corner of his mouth quirking. Digg’s mouth pressed into a small smile. “Ok, well anyone’s business but yours…but I’m going to say this exactly once. Don’t you ever play that card with her again. I know why you did what you did, and it was one hell of a Hail Mary that only our girl could receive. But I’m telling you right now, if you say it again and you are not ready….not ready to _really_ mean it…you and I are going to have a serious problem.”

Oliver had thought something like this might have been coming. John Diggle’s friendship and protective nature regarding their favorite hacker was a quality that Oliver would never do anything but foster. Even if it meant sometimes getting chewed out for whatever stupid thing Oliver had done that particular week. He looked at Felicity’s sleeping face for a moment before leveling his gaze on his friend. There was no point in discussing the matter any further.

“Message recieved.” 

The solider watched him for a moment longer, before a real smile streched across his face. Setting his beer down, he drew himself up and pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket. 

“Well we have about 12 more hours of shore leave, I’m going to go check out this night market you recommended, see about picking up a new piece for my collection. Who knows when I’m going to get another chance to travel, now that your broke ass is not going to be paying me the vacation days I had on the books.”

Oliver laughed and kicked half-heartedly at Dig’s leg. “Go, get out of here for a bit, I’ll watch her.” Jumping over the leg easily, Dig grabbed his jacket and the keys. “Don’t wait up, I’m going to try and stay up most of the night so I can have some hope of sleeping on the plane.” 

As the sounds of Digg’s footsteps on the stairs faded, Oliver took a deep slow breath, savoring the rare opportunity to observe Felicity in a moment of unguarded stillness. He had always thought she was beautiful, but the sight of her so relaxed, the warm light the potbelly stove framing her familiar face, warmed him more than he could just credit the alcohol for.

There was a fair portion of scotch suffused his veins, giving him a languid, content feeling he had not let himself experience for such a long time, it was almost alien. For someone who had vowed to spend his life alone, it was was a strange thing, to let someone steal away your solitude. Her very presence had this strange ability to calm him. As long as she was still with him, he knew that he was ok. If there was nothing this last horrible year had taught him, it was that as long as Felicity Smoak still believed in him, he could survive anything. 

Tossing a few pillows on the ground next to where she laid curled up on the couch, he moved to lay down on the floor, pushing the coffee table over to give him more space. He carefully extracted her glasses from the top over her head, tucking the stray hair he had dislodged behind her ear. 

He hesitated a moment before giving in, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. A quiet, contented sound escaped her sleeping lips as she turned her head slightly towards him. Smiling at her unconscious reaction, he set her glasses down on the table and laid down on the floor, intending to move her to a bed once she was in a deeper sleep. But in the span of ten breaths, he also slipped into darkness. 

\----------- -------------- ------------- -------------- -------------

Felicity’s pained cry jolted him from his sleep, an adrenaline spike sending his hand reaching for the knife in his boot before his eyes had even fully opened. Pushing his heavy limbs into a crouch as he scanned the dim room for any sign of an intruder. It took only a moment for him to realize she was having a nightmare, and they were still alone in the safehouse. Slightly darker for the fading fire in the stove. 

Closing the blade he set it down on the table and moved to sit on the edge of the couch. Her hands, clenched white knuckled on the pillow, the long muscles in her legs twitching as she ran in sleep, her breath rapid and shallow.

“Felicity…” He spoke softly, resting a hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently as he said her name a bit louder. _“Felicity.”_

No change, if anything she was becoming more frantic. He slipped his hand between her back and the couch he could feel how fast her heart was pounding as he moved to place his other hand beneath her neck, supporting her head as he started to lift her up towards him. The change in orientaion worked, and with a cry she jolted awake, for a moment struggling violently to get out of his arms. 

“Shhhhh, you safe. It was a nightmare….shhhh. Its me.” He spoke as gently his could, and she stopped moving as his voice got through to her waking mind. Her breathing began to slow. Turning in his grip, she wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders and buried her face against his throat. Several minutes passed, and he slowly picked her up and turned to sit back down on the couch, settling her down in his lap, not liking how badly she was still shaking.

How many nightmares like this had she suffered alone? 

Eventually her breathing returned to normal, the coiled muscles relaxing. As she slowly began to extract herself from under his chin, she looked a bit sheepish to find herself in his lap. She tried to withdraw from his arms, but he found himself squeezing her a bit tighter. A flash of memory, _steel sliding close across her throat_ …He wasn’t quite ready to let go. 

She squinted at him a bit, trying to decide what expression was on his face before surrendering, relaxing in his grip. 

“Slade?” He asked quietly. She nodded.

“Waiting in the manor was harder than I thought it would be. Knowing he was coming was worse than being caught by surprise. I’ve never had that much time to anticipate terror. ” She rested her head against his shoulder and watched the slightly out of focus embers of the dying fire. “Your kitchen is going to need a bit of remodeling by the way…”

He grimaced.

“After you left, I didn’t know what I should do. Becides having a panic attack in the foyer of course. After a while, I realized how hungry I was, couldn't even remember when the last time I’d eaten. So I went rooting around in the kitchen for some food…found some canned peaches and green beans in the back of the pantry. I had just about finished when I heard the floor creak.” She shuttered, remembering the sound of his voice from behind her. “I didn’t want to make it too easy...managed to whack him in the side of the head with a cast iron frying pan.” She said with a note of pride. “I just don’t think he was expecting me to try and hit him….things degenerated quite a bit after that.” She sighed, shoving the memory of being tossed across the kitchen like rag doll to the back of her mind. She felt Oliver’s grip relax, as he began to retreat from her again. 

“I’m sorry Felicity…leaving you in leaving you there like that…leaving you for Slade. It was against every instinct I have. Every step, I wanted to turn around and come back for you. Try and find some other way…” Felicity shook her head, and extracted herself from his lap. Setting her bare feet on the carpet she looked up at him, taking a long fortifying breath. 

“I’m not sorry.” She looked at him sidelong. “I’m not really the big flashy hero type. I’m not strong. I’m more likely to scream like a little girl when I get scared than jump to save the day. So I need you to understand…I’m not sorry Oliver. You trusted me with the lives of every single person in Starling City. I’m not sorry to know that when you really, really needed me. I came through. Knowing…that someone like you trusts me that much…it means everything to me.” She reached down and took his hand, squeezing it tightly as she stared at him, eyes taking on that terrifing edge they always did when Felicity Smoak had made up her mind about something. He looked away first, shaking his head. 

“I’m not saying that I’m not going to have nightmares…and that I don’t have a full blown phobia of needles now. But some good sleep, and possibly alot more of this wine….I’ll be fine.” She smiled, and Oliver watched her face for a long moment. Finally he returned her squeeze with his own and stood. 

“Don’t ever think that you’re not a hero Felicity.” He smiled at her and turned to move towards the little stove, needing to put some space between them before he did or said something truly unwise. He added a few logs and stoked the coals as she reached over to turn on the endtable lamp, warm light flooding the corner of the room. Grabbing her glasses and the latest edition of PC Magazine from the table, she propped her feet back up on the couch. 

“I’m too wired to sleep now.” She replied at his inquiring look. He nodded before returning to other end of the couch. He looked down at the pillows on the floor and contemplated just laying down again, but without a word she lifted up her legs and gestured to the empty side of the couch. Too tired to protest he plopped down on the far end of the couch, settling her feet down into his lap. Jamming a pillow behind his neck and resting his other arm on her leg, he leaned his head back. 

“I’m just going to rest my eyes.” He pressed his back further into the couch as the renewed heat from the stove began to seep towards them, warming his sore, exhausted body. Felicity just smiled at him from behind the magazine. 

“Uh huh.”

 

\----------- ------------- ------------ ---------------

 

Several hours later, Diggle quietly let himself back into the apartment, finding the pair of them sound asleep on the couch. A magazine open on her stomach, with her feet hugged against Oliver’s chest. The archer was sleeping so soundly that not only did he not hear John come in, he was snoring lightly. He laughed silently, setting the well-wrapped painting he had bought down by the door, and moving to get some coffee brewing. The sun was almost up, and they would have to leave to catch the ARGUS support flight back to Starling in two hours. Walking past his two friends, he stopped for a moment just to watch the pair of them. 

They the were the most devoted, dysfunctional, not actually married, married couple he had ever seen. 

He sighed. 

They needed to get their crap sorted out if they were going to be Godparents, that was for sure. 

A soldier’s work was never done it seems. Shaking his head with a smile, he turned to start on that coffee, they all had a lot of work ahead of them. Coffee was as good a place to start as any.

 

The end. (Comments? This is my first real Arrow fic!)


End file.
